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Se zkušeným lektorem a trenérem paměti

THE LONGEST WORD

What is the longest word in the English language?

"Smiles". Because there is a mile between its first and last letters!

Penguin

A man was walking along Hietzinger Hauptstrasse near ParkhotelSchönbrunn when he found a penguin walking along the road.So he picked it up and took it to the local police station.
He said to the policeman "I found this penguin on HietzingerHauptstrasse, near Parkhotel Schönbrunn. What should I do with it?"
The policeman looked at the man and said "It's obvious what you shoulddo with it! Take the penguin to Schönbrunn Zoo.
The man said "Of course, I'll take it to the zoo" and he left the policestation with the penguin under his arm.
The next day the policeman was on duty in the city centre when he sawthe man walking along the street with the penguin by his side. The policeman stopped the man and said "I thought I told you to take the penguin to the zoo?"
The man replied "Yes, I took it to the zoo yesterday. Today I'm taking it to see the Opera House."

Two Balloons (present tense version)

Two balloons are floating across the desert.
One balloon says to the other:
"Look out for the cactussssssssssss!"

What's 3 x 2?

A little boy returned home from school and told his father that hehad failed the maths test.
His father asked him, "Why did you fail?"
The boy replied, "The teacher asked me 'How much is 3 x 2?' and I said'3 x 2 is 6'."
"Well, that's right" said his father.
The little boy continued, "Then she asked me 'How much is 2 x 3?"
"What the hell is the difference?" asked the father.
The son replied, "That's exactly what I said to my teacher and that'swhy I failed the maths test.

Two Balloons (past tense version)

Two balloons were floating across the desert.
One balloon said to the other:
"Look out for the cactussssssssssss!"

Why

Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 789!
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